Every individual has a way to feel loved, in my research before this article I discovered most men have not taken out time to know how they feel loved, well I’m not very surprised as a man crave for respect more than he craves for love. So when the bible says “wives submit to your husbands and husbands love your wives” the instruction was intentional.
I will encourage every husband to discover his love language and ensure he knows that of his spouse, likewise the wive. An individual can have the five, one is usually stronger. For mine, you can’t be close to me and not have experienced a display of my strongest love language, even my children now exhibits it.
OK, let’s go through them all;
l. Words of affirmation – using words to build up the other person. “Thanks for
taking out the garbage.” Not – “It’s about time you took the garbage out. The
flies were going to carry it out for you.”
A man/woman whose major love language is this, soak up words like air. Every word matters. Every mistake in words hurts deep. And so to speak such person love language, the spouse has to constantly speak affirmative words (else catar go burst😟).
2. Gifts – a gift says, “He was thinking about me. Look what he got for me.” It doesn’t have to be expensive or big. As long as you got it just for him/her. It doesn’t even have to cost N50, the act/effort shows the person was in your thought and that’s basically all that counts.
3. Acts of Service – Doing something for your spouse that you know they would
like. Cooking a meal, washing dishes, vacuuming floors, are all acts of service. Bathing the children, polishing the shoe, setting out the next day clothes, the list is endless. Bottom line is a person with this love language loves to be served/helped.
4. Quality time – by which I mean, giving your spouse your undivided attention. No phones, no laptops, nothing extra. Just sit, look into each other eyes, hold hands and gist.
Taking a walk together or sitting on the couch with the TV off – talking and
listening.
5. Physical touch – holding hands, hugging, kissing, sexual intercourse, are all
expressions of love. A person with this love language want to hug you when they see you, want to pat your shoulder or anything that will ensure their hand touches you.
As couples, it is absurd if the only time there is touch is when sex is needed especially if one of the couple has this love language. Touch for such person need be constant, at random moments, uncountable times for a spouse.
Out of these five, each of you has a primary love language which speaks more
deeply to you than all the others. An individual can have the five, but they each will carry different percent, one always ranking higher than the others. Discovering each other’s language and speaking
it regularly is the best way to keep love alive in a marriage.
✍Omolola Natural ©April’19.
#strictlyfordmarried#
#saveamarriage#
One comment on “The love languages & your marriage”
Afuye Kenny
Great words. More grace in Jesus name.